90 – Day Journey

The First Clear Day: No Smoke, Just Me

 A Day Without Smoke

Day one was quiet — the kind of quiet you notice deep in your bones.

I stayed home all day. And I didn’t smoke. Not once.

That in itself still feels like a miracle.

No morning joint.

No afternoon top-up.

No nightcap smoke.

Instead, I kept my mind busy. I called friends. I talked with family. I just kept myself engaged — because I knew that idle time would drag me back to the old habit.

 No Appetite, But I Tried

Something strange happened to my appetite that day: it disappeared.

I cooked for myself — a simple meal of rice with mixed veggies like okra and potatoes — but I could barely eat. I had just one small meal the entire day. My stomach felt shut down, or maybe it was just adjusting to a life without the artificial hunger that weed always brought.

The detox water I drank — warm water with cucumber, mint, ginger, apple cider vinegar, and a little honey — helped a lot. It felt cleansing.

I drank around 1.5 liters of this herbal mix, and made another batch for the next day.

And I kept drinking water — hydrating my body like it was my full-time job. I wanted to flush it all out — every last trace.

 Mental Game: Strong

I didn’t really have physical cravings on Day One. But I did feel the pull of old behavior.

Normally, if I was home, I’d start the day with a joint. If I came home from work, the first thing I’d do was roll up. And then I’d stay high the entire day — joint after joint, hour after hour, doing nothing meaningful. Just surviving.

But not today.

“Stay firm. Remember how huge your desire is to be clean.”

I repeated that to myself often. This time, it wasn’t just about quitting.

It was about becoming someone new. Someone I always knew I could be.

 A Different Kind of Silence

My family noticed something was different.

“Why are you so quiet today?” someone asked.

It’s not that I was sad. I was just clear.

I didn’t feel the need to talk much. I just wanted to experience this rare, raw, unfiltered presence.

And when the day passed and I realized I had gone 24 full hours without weed, my confidence skyrocketed.

Just yesterday, I couldn’t even imagine being sober for a few hours — let alone a whole day. And now? Now I know it’s possible.

 The Night: A Battle for Sleep

If the day felt like a win, the night felt like a challenge.

I couldn’t sleep.

I tossed, turned, stared at the ceiling. My body was tired, but my brain wouldn’t settle. I was up all night, just lying there with my thoughts racing.

Eventually, I dozed off — maybe for two to three hours, no more. But it was restless and broken.

Still, I count it as a win. Because even through the insomnia, I didn’t relapse. I didn’t reach for weed. I endured.

 Journal Entry Snapshot

“Day One passed. I feel light. I feel clear.

I will always come back to this notebook — especially when cravings hit.

My energy is rising. My confidence is back. I’m doing this for myself.

For my wife. For my family. For my future.

You don’t have time for smoke anymore. You’ve got a life to build.”

What Helped Me on Day 1

•  No Smoking at all — 100% clean
•  Busy mind — talked with friends and family to stay occupied
•  Herbal detox water — warm water with cucumber, mint, ginger, apple cider vinegar, and honey (1.5L)
•  Light meal — rice with veggies (okra, potato)
•  Journaling — wrote down my truth to stay accountable
•  No cravings, just old patterns I interrupted

 Final Reflection

This time, I’m not just quitting weed.

I’m rebuilding my identity.

Day One was far from perfect — but it was honest, and that’s more than enough.

Here’s to more clear days. One at a time.